tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post7760390937089908996..comments2023-06-04T09:52:39.708-04:00Comments on Muttonings: Bah. Humbug. :-(Meghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10538925473636719361noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post-67003720896723950382007-12-07T18:58:00.000-05:002007-12-07T18:58:00.000-05:00This is going to ramble a bit, please forgive me i...This is going to ramble a bit, please forgive me in advance :)<BR/><BR/>It is so hard to know where others are coming from. There are indeed many people for whom there is no other person or family there for them if an emergency happens. So many people are on the financial edge these days, so much that when something happens like large medical expenses, or being laid off of work or whatever - it is sobering to think about how many people are on that particular edge for many reasons. I guess that it hits home for me because I have been there - and I know just how easily it can happen under the wrong set of circumstances. So many families are just so wounded and in disarray these days. We seem to have lost something of the idea in this country about the role of the extended family.<BR/><BR/>I am thinking of a story told by one of the Fathers about a man who gave a coat to a beggar. The next day he saw the same coat in a market, where the man had sold it and he was saddened by this - that he had wasted his goods by doing this. That night he had a dream, and Christ was wearing the coat. <BR/><BR/>We can't second guess, though that is so very hard not to do - and sometimes the neediest person may not look like they are.<BR/><BR/>As far as your friend asking you to help her friend, perhaps this was just her way of encouraging her friend to pursue the business approach? Perhaps this is a stretch.... <BR/><BR/>Ok, I will stop rambling now :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post-78975110887153830142007-12-07T13:20:00.000-05:002007-12-07T13:20:00.000-05:00I couldn't get the order page to work, so that's m...I couldn't get the order page to work, so that's my answer on that.<BR/><BR/>However, I agree - it is so hard to remember to not second guess, which I am very, very, very guilty of. And, we are bombarded by requests, and I don't have the ability to help all. I just need to remember to help where I can.<BR/><BR/>Sigh. But I need to give more. That is definitely for sure.Mimihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02645484704486562810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post-38465967263375726382007-12-07T07:49:00.000-05:002007-12-07T07:49:00.000-05:00You do have a point, Meg. When we first became Ort...You do have a point, Meg. When we first became Orthodox, our then priest warned us against becoming "burned out" by trying to do everything and help everyone. He specifically mentioned that some people tend to take advantage. I guess in this case it boils down to the level of trust we have in the referring friend's judgement. For myself, I still prefer to think of giving first, and then watching to see if I'm being taken advantage of. I can always stop giving if I see a need to. On the other hand, though, recently I sorely needed help, not monetary but emotional support, and I turned to people I trusted and got lambasted so badly for being "unchristian" that I learned a lesson to look more deeply first at the hurt the person is experiencing. As far as this person turning to strangers instead of family for help (and you have to admire her integrity to start a business instead of ask for a hand-out), there are so many family that are ripped apart by discord that it's not a stretch at all for me to think that she/he can't turn to them. You do make a good point, though.Suzannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00637064836812571673noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post-26871158478175289472007-12-07T06:52:00.000-05:002007-12-07T06:52:00.000-05:00I don't see it as a question of "judging" whether ...I don't see it as a question of "judging" whether or not someone "deserves" my help, just that before I buy anything from this person -- especially something I absolutely do not need -- I'd like to know what his other resources are. Are there really *no* other resources?<BR/><BR/>As for practicing charity, there are plenty of places right in my own family where charity is needed, not least of which is my father-in-law. I've also given to relative strangers -- after I was able to contact their priest and determine that their need was, indeed, dire. That's all that's bothering me -- what's really going on here, and why is someone else presuming on my friendship to help out *her* friend?Meghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10538925473636719361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5379111.post-78405040879914833412007-12-06T21:12:00.000-05:002007-12-06T21:12:00.000-05:00Meg, I had many of the same thoughts and concerns ...Meg, I had many of the same thoughts and concerns when I heard of this situation. However, several years ago I was the "family" to which someone turned when she found herself deeply in debt and out of a home. I was terribly "used" at that time, and I had some really negative (justifiably so) feelings toward this person. All that aside, since we don't know the particulars of this case, would it be fair to guess and judge whether or not this person "deserves" our help, however small? I would hope that if I were in need of help of any kind that I would not be judged as to whether or not I was worthy or deserving of that help. When I think of it (and that's not all the time), I try to practice Charity in whatever small way I can and leave the rest to God. I hope I've not overstepped my bounds here.Suzannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00637064836812571673noreply@blogger.com