Tuesday, September 05, 2006

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas...

...before I will ever see the back of this affair. After the latest examination, the wound-care specialist said, "What was my original estimate? 4-6 weeks? I probably shouldn't have said that." "Meaning," I said, "it'll take longer." "It'll take longer."

Actually, it's beginning to look a lot like never at this point. I think I will just give up hope of ever having a normal life again -- that's the safest route. Well, I see the oncologist this Friday for the final (presumably) exam, and we'll see what he has to say about anything. With my luck, he'll recommend a few rounds of chemo just to add to the overall misery. Why not?

Meanwhile, I've come up with a scenario for my little sucky buddy, though it only works if you're into sci-fi, as I discovered when I pulled it on the nurse today, and she had no idea what I was talking about. I decided -- this all comes from the appearance of my navel, with this big black THING sucked into it -- that the "vac" is actually a tricorder that is recording all kinds of information about me, and when I plug the vac/tricorder into the wall outlet ostensibly to charge the battery, it starts relaying the info back to the Mother Ship. These particular aliens aren't into anal probes, but prefer navel probes -- one thing to be thankful for, at least.

Hey, I need some kind of self-generated insanity to keep me sane.


Philippa said...

Aw shucks, Miss Meg. That time frame doesn't make me happy. Not one little bit.

Though I love the Mother Ship idea. Though why not reverse the idea. When you plug the vac into the outlet, it is pulling information from the world and sending it into you so YOU become the brainyest woman on the earth! Now that's COOL!

Meg said...

Nah, at the rate this thing is sucking stuff out of me, my brains will be sucked out right along with everything else. ;-)

Mimi said...

Bwaahahahahha, I love Philippa!

Sigh. Nativity? That's not cool. Ugh, ugh, ugh.